November 22, 2017

ACCOUNTABILITY

This is a difficult thing sometimes.

We all have busy lives. Many of us have stressful jobs, children to raise, obsessive hobbies, an aversion to change or challenge. I, myself, have an affinity for staying at home, redecorating my house and staying in my pajamas. I get anxious when my schedule fills up and I have to disrupt my precious plan of no plans.

BUT!

I have made an effort recently to be accountable to civic engagement. I've decided to make this leap because our political landscape is a shit storm of terror. That may be hyperbole.

As such, here are the actions I've taken to be accountable to my community, my country, and ultimately, to myself and those that I love.

  • I've joined my local Democratic Club and tried to be as active there as time allows. 
  • I created the art for the club's endorsed candidate door hanger for the 2016 election. We distributed as many as we could to all the registered democrats and encouraged them to get out to vote. 
  • I applied, was appointed and then confirmed to a position on my city's Community Safety Commission, where I will serve a three year term. UPDATE: I am now the Chair of this Commission. 
  • And finally, I will start being loud and proud about these and all the other actions I have and will continue to take under this administration. Sometimes I'll post a diary of sorts here to chronicle the efforts. Other times, I'll post it on Facebook. (ugh, facebook)
It's scary to be so transparent about these things.

You can attract confrontation and colorful disagreement. But I'm choosing to react optimistically about this. I'm choosing to believe that passionate debate about these issues IN PLAIN VIEW of others is the only way out of this messy mess. When people say that we shouldn't talk about politics, I get super hot and bothered because on the contrary, talking about politics is how we encourage civic engagement. Political differences don't have to be intimidating or offensive or taboo. Debate is healthy! And even if you are afraid you don't have much to contribute to the conversation because you're not "informed enough" - I say, bullshit. You live in America. You've had experiences in America. You've voted before - at least you better have and if you haven't and aren't registered, click here now and then come back and finish reading later. 

...ok, did you register? if you don't want to pick a party, choose Independent! It's super empowering. 

...you did it, right? 

CONGRATS!

Where was I?

Yes, your experiences have offered enough perspective for you to form, express, and share your opinion on many things. And if in sharing them, you are taught something you didn't previously know, well, then, great! Listening to those around you and considering their experiences is like a super power. Ignorance is only dangerous if you don't acknowledge it. Learning, listening, growing, evolving, all are goals we should hold for ourselves.

Admitting to someone else that you were mistaken, ill-informed, or just plain wrong is not embarrassing. It's NORMAL and much appreciated.

All this to say, you have a voice. Use it proudly and with an open mind. I'm working on it over here too and I'll mess up and get nervous but I'll keep trying.

The apprehension to using that voice isn't dissimilar to stepping out of your comfort zone and trying something new, meeting someone new,  proclaiming something you believe in to someones not so new.

Often, it is the fear of being your whole self in front of those you know very well, those you've perhaps known all your life, that's the hardest.

But perhaps, going there, will be the most rewarding.

I support you.

xo



October 3, 2017

DEAR J

dear J
i'm sorry i never said hello to you

i meant to many times
i'm sure i smiled in your direction

do you remember that one time
we made eye contact?

you were standing in the hall above
i was walking into government class
it felt like something
to me

i wish i had been braver then
high school isn't great for that
that's not an excuse

i always thought you were attractive
i always thought you were cool
much cooler than i felt

all this to say
hello, i like you
i hope you are well

i hope you are well.


September 28, 2017

CHANGED

and the world
in a flash
fell all apart

why am i here?
what am i doing?
why am i here?

retracing my steps
can't find my old path
i stand alone

when the world
fell apart
i created my own